My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
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