No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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