kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
