Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
