Christians are straight up FREAKS
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
