The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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