Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
