Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
