If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
