I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
it's like iHOP with fire
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
