im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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