Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I'm at about main and main street
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
