Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize