I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
