Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize