the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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