we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
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