I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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