I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
