New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
