I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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