i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
