SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Randomize
