So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
