Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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