8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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