Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
there was a trapeze. enough said
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize