Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Omg I joined a choir last night...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
