when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
