This is not my ceiling
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Randomize
