Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
