I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
