i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
