i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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