Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Your cock deserves a montage
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
