Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
