Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize