people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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