Already got asked if we're dating
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
