a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Randomize
