I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize