just come out here and I will go home with you...
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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