Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
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