Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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