what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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