Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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