put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
