if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
