Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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