someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
