If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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