i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
